Sometimes It's Hard To Help Feeling Pissed, Upset, Happy And Mad In A Place That Leaves You Feeling Pissed, Upset, Happy And Mad.

sometimes it's hard for me to say the truth...which hurts. some of us try to hide the truth and live with each other with relationships of friendships based on lies. some of us try to sugar up the truth so that it doesn't hurt so much as it is supposed to. others jsut say it, either mainly due to their hatred of someone or in a fit of anger. after a fight, we always say to each other that we didn't mean to say what we had said, but isn't what we say to each other in a fight always the truth of what we really think about each other. truth hurts. so do we have to hide the truth, to make everyone happy? noone will be ever happy, be it either we tell the truth or not.

they somethings should better be left unsaid. but then again, sometimes it's best we say what we want to say. instead of keeping it in us, and always seeming that we are not keeping something that could either make or break relationships, friendships or an establishment.

well, work is great. why? cause you get pay for your hardwork. for standing for 8 hours plus plus. then you also get to hang out with different people. people who can make you laugh, make you think and also maybe feel where some people like to go wrong in. everyone's good in their own way i hope. but however noone's perfect. even if they try, the more it will appear that they are just obsessive not perfect.

it's painful to mention names. not for me...but for the people mentioned. they might get the hint. they might not. but here goes. all establishments run by power. power corrupts, absolute powers, corrupts absolutely. remember that. but sometimes we tend to let personal greed take over. it does not happen only in buisnesses but even in clubs and societies, where personal greed will take over for popularity. but anyway, this is how it is.

over here, we've got different people each with their own problems. we've got someone who likes things to just run nicely and to make everything to appear nicely but may change his/her mind just like that. we've got someone who makes you do three things at once while complaining about one thing you've didn't do and nagging you to do another thing immediately while you are attening to customers or doing an order or whatever. there's someone who is always keen to changing things to that someone's preference and just letting people know about it and also making sure everything is done by the book, when sometimes follwing the book is not the only way to good work. we've got someone who makes everyone seem a criminal when someone else hasn't done a job right. we've got someone who has the abilty to make you pissed and make you go 'huh' in three seconds and that someone has the ability to make you feel stupid upon asking any question. we've got someone who doesn't belive in own spaces. we've got someone who not gets hectic but makes others around that person blur as well. we've got someone who belives in having his/her own fun while stopping others from having any sense of enjoyment anytime he/she does not like it. we've got someone who thinks he/she rules with his/her 'long-running' serivce. and we've got someone trying to get it all together.

how do we live in scoiety when we have to cope with all this different expectaions. how do we switch. how do we survive? "i will survive"?..i hope i do.

Culda

Life's And It's Other Issues Seem To Complicate Even The Brightest Of Minds.

PERSONAL REFLECTION
it always has to come to this. one way or another, if not now, sometime later, you really have to stop for a while and think where you are and where your next pit-stop in life is. is what you are doing right? is everything going the way it should be? have you ignored your life by going after something that you are just succumbed to? heck, well, we don't really have much of a choice, since we are in an age that we are required to take all advantages to go all the way to the top to get the best living status. we are all money-driven right now. what happened to the good old times when we were all happy and stuff.

everyone, even the most jovial, happy-go-lucky and carefree type of people will someday just sit down in dark corner of a room and think through and reflect upon their life's events. be it whether about studies, love, family, friends or fetishes, it'll be thought through...that's part of life.

sure not everyone will admit to all that they are going through this mid-mid-life-crisis. yes...mid-mid-life-crisis. or also known as a mental menstruation, but i don't know who knows it as that. anyway, the thing is, the point of going through this jsut kinda makes us feel something about where our life is going. we can either feel sad about it or happy about it. if we feel sad, then we'll figure out how to do whatever needs to be done.

nowadays alot of people seem to be pondering over their love affairs, issues and crushes. some people think of getting back while some see getting back useless. some people think of cheating while others just call it as experimenting and getting back-ups. some people enjoy singlehood while others say they enjoy the accompaniment of someone smooching their neck. everyone has his/her own perception/view/thinking. who are we to stop them.

hm, some girls i know say they are not willing to commit to a relationship. one cause they say they've been hurt before. another reason is that they have commintment issues, meaning they might neglect having a relationship. another reason is that they said their love already belongs to an ex-boyfriend. or in some cases, girlfriend. sometimes, we just have to forget the fact that we are busy or what. everyone falls in love. whether madly or truly madly deeply. however they try their best not to go all the way. sometimes it's also due to fear that they prevent themselves from being close to someone...afraid they might be rejected or they might cause emotional burden or emotional hurt on the other party. sometimes, it kinda hurts. cause i mean there's this saying that 'men are not to be trsuted' or something like that. but just like when a guy goes gay, the girls would say 'no, that means we girls have failed'. that line was provided by someone. then isn't it the same thing, that we guys have failed. i mean, my men have tried, and tried and we always make it all gooooooooood...then all of a sudden there's this bunch of girls who make us feel that we really did fail...well...

well, thaat's life...part of it...sleepy...i'll update some other time

Culda

P.S. til we meet again

I Expected It Out From You But Just Not So Soon So Now All I Can Do Is To Push Forward All My Plans And Just Give What's COming To You.

'welcome ladies and gentlemen to the 2008 southwest area campfire'...who was i saying that too? NOONE! everyone was like having a family reunion upstairs at the foodcourt 5 foyer. hm, then i was like testing out the mic for a while before actually making contact with human beings instead of my imaginary friends. anyway, that seems to be the norm for me according to what some people might say. alright, more stuff actually happened.

RED FOX INVESTITURE - LET NOT THE UNIFORM DEFINE YOU BUT INSTEAD LET YOURSELF DEFINE YOUR UNIFORM
it began just like any other day. but today was what should have been a very memorable life in the young boys lives. the investiture began after afew friendly tekan sessions from asl while i snapped some pictures...pictures not here yet...damn...took pics of the scouts doing stuff, of the ventures slacking and of my ass and even a water cooler. i would've have been more shutter-happy if i had used a SLR camera. anyway, back to the topic.

i was the flag-bearer...meaning i was the one who was carrying the flag for the scouts to promise themselves onto. the flag was heavier than i thought. anyway, after the scouts got investitured, the ventures got investitured. the new ventures that is. then after that the was the rank presentation where we congratulated those of the new PLC by whacking their sleeves...it's a scout thing. anyway, after that we scooted off to the workshop to have a scout history talk. seriously rather interesting. at least for me. follwing that event, the scouts were invited to play LAN...niiiiice...but it was off to SP for southwest campfire.

CAMPFIRE - SHITS-O-MANIA
ate kfc...unhealthy but well you know, it's better than nothing. but kfc is better than mcdonalds and long john's and stuff like that. but i prefer popeye's chicken to kfc....anyway, back to the topic. helped with the firewood area by hijacking a dustbin and putting the zinc plates in it to transport it from newtown to sp. after that played some music on the sound system. chopped wood, slacked, then met the service scouts to 'attend' to them. briefed them on what to do...talked with them and stuff like that...all boring stuff.

anyway, the moment i saw the entire campfire layout from a full view, i could see that it sucked. the gateway wasn't impressive...the backdrop was so budget, the campire cirlce looked more like something you would see at a wayang. the stage was so small that you had to have very active eyeballs to prevent yourself from not seeing the edge of the stage to prevent you from falling over.

it started to rain after a while...then sun...then rain, then shine...so we prettly much decided on the dry weather as the most probable...but 10 mins before we were told that it would be dry plan no matter what...everyone was like 'what the f***!' then it pretty much went down hill from there. the programme got held up for 30 mins plus plus...crapped my way for the pre-show...

the emcee-ing was okay la...one mic was soft so could not be heard...i was mostly using the wireless so i was walking around. but it was mostly us emcees against the restrictions. like we couldn't have songs with wrong implications. when i was working the crowd, i was told not to. then halfway i lost my programme list so for two minutes we were lost but luckily we switched off to the game. so we managed to actually skip la...overall it was okay...but still the campfire was crap...or rather it was fucked...

then at the end, this smart dude came on over and tried to be funny with the rovers. first he came up and started bullshitting with us while interupting us in our post-campfire discussion over the microphones. then he started coming with this small issue which he was trying to make us cry over. the thing is...you've really got to admit this kid had courage to come all the way up to us and try to make us remourse over something so small...kid had his uniform on...then this kid went on to push on the issue by flicking someone's rover flash...son of a *****...but still i just wanted to guy to finish what he wanted to say...i mean...he disrespected his uniform by disrespecting us, why should we disrespect ourselves by doing the same? ass, really spoilt my whole day...and he didn't even congratulate us on what a wonderful job we (rovers) did. noone did. anyway, rovers did good...everyone did good. just that some people did it 'too good'...catch my drift?

Culda