Many Men Go Fishing All Of Their Lives Without Knowing That It Is Not Fish They Are After.

i've been thinking. sometimes, why do we do the things we do? do we really know what we want? we do the things that make us happy. cause we all desire to achieve happiness. but why do we want happiness? does it really make our lives more meaningful? more worth it? is that what we think of life? a pursuit of happiness? do we have this thinking in our minds that happiness will really lead to us eventually attaining a beautiful and good life? but then the question is, what is a bad life? where and what is the line that seperates good and bad?

anyway, are we really sure of what we want? when we go and accomplish something, what do we win it for and what for? honor? self-pride and a sense of accomplishment? what is the accomplishemnt for then? it's never ending isn't it. then why do we have friends? what's the point in loving? so we know how to hurt and deal with hurt? what's the point in being strong when at the end of the day, you don't exactly know why you have to be strong for? all this thoughts may have simple answers cause sometimes we may be too ignorant to accept the fact that our thoughts and perceptions can be questioned. we get too defensive. and why do we get so defensive? cause at the back of our minds, we have the littlest sense of insecurity about our own confidence in our own profound ideologies and principles.

forgive me for thinking too much. but i'm curious. and that's how we grow. never stop asking questions. because when we do, we just stop growing and our minds soon turn into a pile of dust that will be left to be blown away when we are decomposing in a sandy and dirty grave in some god-forsaken barren region.

anyway, went down to sp today for canoe polo training. had a fun time throwing balls and passing them to others. practicing our throwing arm. practice makes perfect. at first i was like, "throwing balls?". and after that session, i was like "what? no more throwing balls?". yeah, then moved on to rolls. wall roll, paddle roll, and arm/hand roll. it was great. learnt the leg stuff and all that. one step closer. to my dream. my wish. my never-dying hope.

then moved on to macrithcie for sprint training. had fun in the k-boat. it's like bitch of a girlfriend you're not used to. hard to handle, but once you get used to it, you got it where you want it to be. anyway, then did circuits, gym and then had a very refreshing yet expected cool down with 100 plus pumping. nope, i'm not talking about inflating the sports drink. i am talking about the push-ups, or in some countries, the press-ups. yep, damn, gotta work harder. gotta pull it through. next week. 200 push ups at least.

dreams are not those that think when you're asleep. dreams are those that you think of after you wake up.

had a nice time with you the other day. nice interview. know you're reading. and just to let you know...no, i'm not pissed. oh and why isit everytime it always ends up being very un-friendly on MSN. haha, only god knows. alright, what else do you want me to say now? hm, never mind...just kidding. i wasn't gonna say anything anyway.

hm, MST coming up soon. gotta chiong for it already. econs, stats and ITAB. argh, i hate ITAB. gotta chiong hard for all this three modules. the rest probably can scrape through without much hassle? just a guess, hope. something like that. why do i think so much when it comes to econs especially. like doesn't everyone like pasta. so does it matter if it is still a inferior good? demand go down when income rises? erm, when i have more money, i buy more pasta. god damn assumptions. don't assume that everyone is like you. however, also don't assume that everyone is not like you.

hm, what more should i say right now? do i write alot? i don't notice it at all. what can i say - it's a gift and curse.

Culda