Monday, November 16, 2009

I Wanna Run With You Into The Sunset.

it's been what? a week? a week and a half since i've been talking to her? and you know, am i regretting talking to her, when i could maybe be doing other things? no i don't at all. why is it so? i always have been wanting to talk to her. and i really do like talking to her. i really do. but now maybe i'm starting to have my doubts whether i should have started talking to her.

was i wrong to do it? cause now i feel that i may screw it up. you know, why is it that it's this particular situation in which i don't wanna mess anything up. i never know when is the right time to talk to her. i dunno when is the right time. oh my god, the only girl who has seriously made me rethink my every movements.

okay, some of you may have read my previous posts about stuff of such relevance and might i just say i was writing it from a different persona most of the time, as seen from the writing and from the signing off. yeah. weird. i know. but whatcha gonna do about it.

anyway, i sometimes wish i could tell her. it was so easy to tell others i liked them. but it seems so hard. maybe i'll continue to talk to her. then maybe when i feel the time is right, which i dunno when, i'll tell her. of course, i have to see how she's reacting to me daily, or when we are talking. things like this are not supposed to happen. is it that i'm can't say it. i don't even know.

but awwwww man, one year. i can't believe it. noone can belive it as well. for one year, and without even talking to her. even not knowing anything about her. am i just imagining it or is what that's has been happening to me happening to me once again? is that what my life is about? oh my god...i'm starting to feel it.

i dunno why, but when i see her, my heart just melts. my eyes start to tear. when i see her just there, i wanna go up to her. and tell her. that i've been wanting to talk to her for a year. but it sounds freaky. does it? doesn't it? i really like her. i really do. you know what. i've just gotta go for it. i'm never gonna know what's gonna happen unless i jsut seize the opportunity. seize the day. seize the moment. try to freeze it in gold and then embrace it. i know i've got it. but i dunno. the chances of her saying no is about 98%. just being realistic. just keeping it real. i can handle the truth. i can take it. it's only been a year.

i can stop my feelings can i? it jsut happens. i don't want them to happen. it jsut does. it's spontaneous. it's involuntary. if she's reading this, what might she think?


Monday, October 26, 2009

Only In This World.

it's time when we just need to indulge in the daily ironies and quirkiness.

The owner of a car with the personalised number plate 'XXXXXXX' has received parking fines for every unidentified car in his city.

A German man who mooned at a train got his trousers caught in a carriage door and ended up being dragged half naked out of the station.

A fraudster who went on the run from US authorities gave himself away - because he couldn't help himself from posting on Facebook.

A Ministry of Defence document advising staff how to stop documents leaking onto the internet has been leaked onto the internet.

Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez has instructed his citizens to stop singing in the shower.

An Air Canada flight was diverted after a passenger stole beer from the drinks trolley.

Police in Papua New Guinea are hunting the leader of a cult who promised villagers a bumper banana harvest if they had sex in public.

A man who refused to take his clothes off at a raunchy party has been blamed for a mini-riot at an Australian nudist resort.

A wife has spoken of her humiliation after she became the first woman to be "divorced" on Facebook.

A hen-pecked husband has been granted a divorce in Italy because his mother-in-law keeps nagging him.

A Saudi woman is seeking a divorce after discovering her husband had nicknamed her 'Guantanamo' on his mobile phone.

Taken from visit it, one of my favorite sites.

All Just Here To Tell You What I've Never Told Anyone.

anyone ever watched the movie 'American Psycho'? well, just in the morning, i had a dream that i was living life from the perspective of the psycho. living through the all the deceits of being human, living through the fact of having a half-broken mask of sanity, living through all the narcissistic sex and living through the murders and killings. i woke up, feeling an internal rush of heat through my body. i adjusted myself a little and found that i was slightly sweaty. the aftermath of the dream maybe. i then started to think. had i liked my dream? is there something in my mind, something in me, i'm not aware of? i felt scared, yes i did. but the adrenalin that was rushing through my body when i was having the dream. i could still feel a bit of the adrenalin rushing through as i thought about my dream again. i looked at the time. 630am. i went back to sleep, trying to dream that same dream again while clutching my pillow tightly with a smile on my face.

okay, this is damn weird. the other time, i was walking home along those provision shop area at eunos there and then i just ate a cheese pancake. so there was a bit of the cheese on at the left side of my mouth. so i tried to lick it. at the same time, there was this kinda buff guy walking towards my direction. so when i saw him walking, i just slid my tongue back into my mouth. all of a sudden, that big guy just smiled at me. and i was like, erm, okay. that was weird.

well, ran on of the best runs i ever ran this whole month. steep hills to run. no stopping at the traffic light. i think i found my route to run. it was seriously good. just need to calculate the distance, see if i'm running a good distance and go with it against my timing. hah, gotta focus now. i've found my grove, can't lose it. and plus, i don't really feel that tired after school. actually, releases stress for me. and yeah, to be the best, you've gotta put yourself in it. and this real run, i've gotta put myself to the test. i know my goal. my goal. i've gotta push man. nov 8. think my training's not that adequate though. still, gotta be positive. really, being positive really works. yeah, and cause you've gotta have a little...erm...uh-hum...motivation.

okay, i'm seriously lost for words. you know, i look at her, and immediately in my mind, i just go, 'awwwwww'. the only girl who has made me say that without her herself having to do anything. talked to her the other day. and it was seriously something i never thought i'd be able to do. i dunno why, but other girls, yeah i can talk to them. no problem. i don't even need to worry about what to say. but...this girl..she's just...what can i say. every little thing she does is seriously magic even though no matter how mundane it is. how is it that i feel like i want her even though i dunno what she really is. wait, did i just say i want her? hm, well, maybe it's true. after all, the first conversation was more than one year in the making. damn, has it really been that long? what have i done? have i hesitated so much? i have so little time. time is seriously running out. now waiting for her to come online. hope she does. am i sweet? seriously? i don't know you know. noone knows what really goes on in my mind. i mean, this, what i'm writing here, is what i really do think of her. the cutest little thing.


Thursday, October 22, 2009

Waiting For Her Hello.

alright, well, quite not bad this whole week so far. was that english? oh god, i dunno...i start anew.

let's start off with days or something. if you wanna hear the funny part, scroll down all the way till you see the funny part in caps.

hm, what did i do on tuesday? okay, i just realised that fom is seriously like one of the best modules we have. lectures are filled with humorous eloquence, proudly shown by our lecturer. and then we have like our tutorial. which may sound daunting with it's 3 hours duration but the first lesson was anything but 'sian' of which i recall saying to the tutor about my feelings of fom. full of games and shit. damn, fom is gonna be the top module and eagerly awaited module. okay, then i don't think i have to say anything about stats tutorial. cause that's like a deja vu of last sem. totally boring. oh and econs. the lecturer appears cutesy wutesy is some way to me. maybe from far. partly due to her voice, and to her inability to make a joke or build up on it. yeah, angela...not bad name as well. suits her in a way. but of course there are other names that can suit her better.

then after school, went to TP. to just do some static exercises. yeah, then saw all the dragonboater girls. and stuff like that. then went back home. tp is really a nice place. esp at night. i think i've said it before.

alright, itab started late. the tutor apparently has this young-old thing going on. he looks young, but he's got this weird old, naggy aura. anyway then came gems. and holy damn, gems is like gems rocks. well it's only been one lesson, and it's just basically slack the most time...but i've got this vibe..i've gotta feeling. wooot....can't wait for next week. why am i so excited. damn. oh yeah, then went for acc remedial. remedial in poly, you ask? yeah...don't talk about it. then stayed abit after a while for econs remedial. fun.

okay, today. went for final theory. and i passed. i looked at the others, who were studying their book with so much stress just before the test and there i was, listening to music, thinking of her (yes, i'm still thinking of her). then i took my time to do the test. finished less than 20mins. walked out, swagger here and there. went to sp, gymed. like finally gymed after so long.

alright. this is the FUNNY PART. okay, i was like thinking maybe the new course, Our nation our world would be like some fun-filled module. but but but. damn. the lecturer is like sitting on the chair, with his hands behind his head and he takes like 5 mins to come up with each word. there are so many ways to describe being in his class.

1. i feel like we are sitting for a funeral procession and he was like chosen to do an impromptu eulogy while suffering from Alzheimer's.

2. it's like you're driving. and then you've gotta stop at the zebra crossing. and all the people who are crossing are like 70 years old plus and walking with canes and what have they. and it's like waiting for the dementia-infested parade to pass. wait, i think being in his class is worse than that.

3. it's like your grandfather talking about the whole family tree and their whole medical records and history.

4. you'd better be off counting your hair then be in his class.

5. it's like your grandfather talking in some language you don't know.

6. it's like one of those torture scenes in saw. live or die make your choice. it was seriously that. cause the window was next to me and i had even unlatched it. either endure a slow beating of your insides or fall to your death, quick and painless.

7. it's like your grandfather talking.

okay. that's about all.

tomorrow i'll blog about her again. serious. i've added her. just waiting for her to accept. i'm ready to talk yo. alright, gotta finish up this pint of haagen daaz and go to sleep.


Monday, October 19, 2009

Keep Pushing, You're Almost Free.

alrighty...first day of semester 2. and surprise surprise!! my stats lecturer is a guy!!! like seriously, i thought the lecturer was a female. then heard the sound of a guy. yeah, i was stunned too. hm, alright i'll start of with my eventful day.

okay, i got this instructor again. some dude so big he hardly fits in the seat of the car. right, started with warm-up in the circuit. my warm-up was like for more than a half an hour in the circuit, which just sucks cause i'll be cruising at first gear most of the time or second gear if i feel like it cause there's just too many cars to consider jumping to the next gear. you need to brake alot and sometimes you even need to brake suddenly immediately cause some jack-off doesn't know when to drive off and when to stop at the stop line which is so clearly painted infront on the road. some of the times, the jack-off is me. but hey, i'm not as bad as the other learners on the road. and it sucks also cause if you just brake immediately and you just need to react as a human being for a minute, you will kinda react by letting go all the levers including the clutch and in case some of you don't know, when you just throw the clutch or let go the clutch without any acceleration, your engine stalls. and i hate it when my engine stalls. cause i know that if my engine stalls one time, then i know that the second and third time won;t be far away. and it's a stupid feeling to have your engine stall at this point of stage. and i only stall my engine it the circuit nowadays. but since i never stay in the circuit for long, i do fine outside.

alright, then today we learnt turning right and changing gears when turning on the move. and then it's like at first i need some getting used to cause that's the first time i'm doing it. so after like god knows how long i was in the circuit, i finally got outside on the public roads. so what i had to do today was turn right mostly and also lane change alot. so at first i was doing fine. then came into those busy roads. so i had to lane change two lanes. and after that i needed to turn right. okay, so i'm in third gear or something, going at about 50 plus kmh and infront there's this lorry. and then i'm looking for a safe time to change lanes. but it was kinda hard cause apparently the cars behind was going faster than me. and i knew they weren't gonna let a learner driver have his moment of accomplishment by changing lanes successfully so i didn't change in the end. then this was the conversation that took place:

Instructor: don't need to turn here naujoth (yes he calls me naujoth, beats the shit out of me even when i told him my name is Nerve-joe-t). turn left infront. you know why you can't turn?
Me: cause the cars are too fast?
Instructor: cause you're too slow (i agree actually). they are going at the right speed. you need to catch up with them if not you will never be able to turn. got it naujoth (again with the naujoth)?
Me: got it.

so after turning left, he asks me to turn lang change and turn right. same thing have to change two lanes. as after turning the left, i sped to like 60plus-70kmh and then after than slowed down to change. then the next roadway, i began to change up gear again. 60kmh. 70kmh. 75kmh. 80kmh. 81kmh. i was about to go faster but red traffic light. damnit. and the thing is, this instructor was different from all the others i got. cause the others would know when i'm going above 70kmh and when i do, they would say "control...control". but this guy. apparently he loves speed. but i hope never get him again. naujoth. i'll show you who's naujoth.

okay, got to school, met jia le, rosanne and lynn and went to school. took taxi from bbdc, thinking i would reach there earlier. but apparently, in the morning, all the good taxi drivers are out. they drive at 50kmh, they drag their freakin second or at the most third gear, they brake way earlier. and they give way!!! and i was like, you seriously shitting me. when i'm wanting to have a nice, smooth drive with no preferance of the speed, the freaking drivers drive like they are attempting to break their own personal best of speed and overtaking maneuvers. and when you need to be on time for something important, you see your taxi driver, smiling, waving as if he was selected to be the 'Be courteous on the road, pass it on" ambassador, and you're just in the back, banging your head against the head restraint, wearing the seat belt for no clear reason. anyway, reached, and like i said, found the lecturer to be an indian guy. swear the whole class is gonna get indianized. first with naz, then with krishanaramamurthy the indian accouting einstein, and now by this dude with the black typical hindu mustache. then after that, wanted to gym but found the gym to be crowded. so went to walk around for two hours plus. after lunch, realised Fundamentals of marketing isn't that bad, what with the new funny and slightly eloquent lecturer, reminding me a little of myself. then came to accounting and lo to behold, the same lecturer, the same lecture theater and the same taglines, "we're behind schedule", "we are late" and the two-hit combo "please don't talk class, we're late".

after all my lessons, went running. and damn, i realise how weak i am, training wise for running. gotta train harder. yeah, and then now i wanna talk about something. someone.

okay, this girl has been on my mind for more thn a year now. ever since i saw her, my heart went gedabak-gedebuk. and it still does. even more. the way her hair falls right in place especially when it's messed up or just loosely going everywhere. the way she runs around, if not on the track or field, then in my mind. the way her smile shines so brightly even under a straight face. there's just so many things about her. oh...oh...oh...the only girl who has made me sincerely acted cute. and seeing her around almost alot of times is just's just not right. cause the more i see, the more it beats me why i like her. but i don't mean to sound like a dick...but i know her first line she will say if i ever do come up to her, which i doubt i know how to do, "i'm not really ready for that". yeah. heck, and don't worry guys, i'm not like one of those shit heads who stalk them to the very core, or jsut stalk them at all. respect whoever you're out after or just basically respect everyone. bloody stupid coneheads. anyway, to her...awwwww man. so many things that should be said, but the words that i am thinking of saying, jsut don't do justice. lately i just feel like going nuts over her. seriously going nuts. crazy. can't stop thinking about her. damn, am i going crazy. it's been a year!! shouldn't like this thing inside of me be going down? but why has it been so that it hasn't? but anyway, you know what. i don't want it to. but awww, seriously. i...have...NEVER...felt like this before. and this is probably gonna be sounding like the scariest shit ever. maybe, maybe not.


P.S. should i have write it all down? is it a mistake? was it a mistake? too late now.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

And I Thought My Neighbors Were Stupid.


anyone needs a dog?


Where's My Audience Of One?

barely a week away from school. if i'm not wrong, three days more, after this day of course. i hate doing countdowns.

what do i have on monday? i have like driving in the morning that ends at 940. and then i've gotta rush off to my first lecture which starts at 10. so i've got twenty minutes to rush from the bukit batok driving centre to bukit gombak mrt, take a train to dover, run up that goddamn hill to MLT 8 and look presentable for my first stats lecture of the new sem. and can someone tell me where is the entrance to MLT 8 that does not lead to the front of the MLT. please? i don't wanna start the day off explaining everything to my lecturer why i was late and then sit right infront of her since it'll be a bitch to look for my class and squeeze in and cause a shit of a scene. well actually there's two scenarios that can happen.

1st scenario:
i rush in late, busting the door down with hair in a mess. lectuer looks at me.
lecturer: why are you late?
me: driving. then took a long time to get here. (omit certain truths like i went fro driving lesson)
lecturer: there was a jam?
me: sorta (again omit the fact that it was human jam that you had to get through at the train and all)

2nd scenario:
i walk with a cool swag, with my hair in a mohawk kinda style. i walk up slowly to the lecturer and about 4 meter away from her, i do this cool two hand gun motions and say 'pooh' in a whisper tone. yeah go ahead do it.
lecturer: why you late?
me: hm, what can i say? shit was going down, i had to step up.
lecturer: gotcha hommie

seems abit out there. but hey, you never know. or what could happen is that she don't even give a shit about me and i just walk in and do my own shit.

yeah then after that, i've got 4 hours break. i'll gym for like 1 hour plus then maybe walk around and see what else is new in sp. that i'll go eat with the clan. gotta bring my cards. then i dunno what else lesson i have after that. and i think i end at 5 that day. then go home, slack, eat and maybe run. or maybe i run in school. hm, idea.

driving is going along well. still ramming as always. haiz...can't wait to get my car. wonder what will it be. i'm thinking like audi R8, lamborghini gallardo or maybe just any sportster. or maybe a pick-up. that'll be nice. yeah, a pick-up. can do alot of things with it. and its a two-door car. it's open top. it rumbles when speeding. oh crap, you can only go like 60 on those things. well, that's the bad part?

what else man? oh yeah, any of you went to this site before, it's like the number one gay and lesbian portal. it's kinda amusing. go check it out. alright signing off.


Monday, October 12, 2009

I Treat Books Like Girls.

just an analogy. don't be mad, don't get mean. it's all in good fun. this is purely based on a stereotypical man's view of girls and it is in no way a representation of how i treat girls in reality.

Navjoth (Nerve-Joe-T) Singh Sheng Ying "It's Not The Race, It's The State Of Mind" says: (10:42:45 PM)
i treat it [books] like girls
N@NdHiNi says: (10:43:56 PM)
Navjoth (Nerve-Joe-T) Singh Sheng Ying "It's Not The Race, It's The State Of Mind" says: (10:44:07 PM)
wanna know how?
N@NdHiNi says: (10:44:34 PM)
u sleep wid it
Navjoth (Nerve-Joe-T) Singh Sheng Ying "It's Not The Race, It's The State Of Mind" says: (10:45:47 PM)
i put it by my bedside table and i sleep near it so that i can always make sure that the book is fine
when i'm reading it, i treat the book gently
don't be too fast when flipping the pages
don't bend the book...cause nobody likes to bend in social situations
N@NdHiNi says: (10:46:50 PM)
hahaha nice one
Navjoth (Nerve-Joe-T) Singh Sheng Ying "It's Not The Race, It's The State Of Mind" says: (10:46:59 PM)
and i always use bookmark so i know when i stopped...
N@NdHiNi says: (10:47:01 PM)
and i don fold the pages
Navjoth (Nerve-Joe-T) Singh Sheng Ying "It's Not The Race, It's The State Of Mind" says: (10:47:18 PM)
never fold the pages cause it hurts when you handle her in such rough ways
and once i'm done with the book...
N@NdHiNi says: (10:47:28 PM)
awesomee.u treat bks juz like the way i do
Navjoth (Nerve-Joe-T) Singh Sheng Ying "It's Not The Race, It's The State Of Mind" says: (10:47:35 PM)
...i dump it away

interesting huh.


Monday, October 05, 2009

I'm Back Ladies.

you know...i've pretty much had a slightly eventful absence. wanna hear about it. of course you do. why else would you be here.

can't believe school's starting. i know i'm gonna sound like a dick or something or might sound geeky but i missed school. aghhhh, so freaking bored these whole month. at first had canoeing which kinda made me always look forward to the next day for training (more on that later on). then also did driving (more on that as well if you were to read on bitches). what else? hm nothing else. oh got something to keep me occupied during the month as well. someone. hmmm...sounds wrong.

anyway, driving. alright, recently i've learnt turning, safety checks, turning, braking, turning and oh yeah ramming the accelerator like i was being chased by the african zulu tribe with a lamborghini. well, not that dramatic or anything but yeah. sometimes i do speed a little.

i remember the one time i raced with this taxi driver. good times, good times. i was like so close to him. and we both were on manual. and my gear shifting was flawless. we both engaged first gear and half-clutched with our engines revving. then with a quick shug!, i shifted to gear two and then quickly to gear three. we were both head-to-head. it was tensed in both cars. i was looking at bonnet and he was probably looking at his meter, seeing how much can he make by actually going a longer way, but that's a different story. but then as i was about to shift to gear 4, something happened, and it disappointed me. there was a car parked infront (hazard) and i was like damn and i even said 'shit'. the instructor looked at me and said 'so now, you wanna race with taxi driver' and my response was the always usual 'hahaha'. not like the hahaha, like you're funny but the hahaha, just shut up and let me drive you foof. foof, yeah it's a new word. i invented it. it's not gonna be a word that i'm gonna use alot so don't really worry about it. tml is the end of my stage 1. revision and then later move on to stage 2 on wednesday. hoo-yeah. i'm a driver baby. i know how to handle a stick. okay, scratch that.

alright so canoeing. it saddens me. cause there's mainly three reasons why i'm dropping. yes three. not four, not 2. just three. and to some, it may seem unreasonable or just childish, but that's cause you're feeling it. it's not the same. it's like having sex. you watch stuff on pornographic website and then you say, man that shit's tight. but you are never gonna really know how it's like being rammed up the ass with an 8-inch black dick, aren't you? or are you? that's why your comments always just tire me. it lacks the sense of understanding, only the layman voice of unreasonable and pointless and uncalled criticism. my life ain't no movie for you to judge. only if i require some help with the production or direction, then i'll maybe call you down. and guess what, i'll even put your name in the credits. and i'll put it in big-big 3d form so the viewers will want to stay to watch how it all turns out.

anyway, canoeing. first reason. it's gonna sound messed up but yeah. when i sit in a boat, i feel that my legs are very confined. and cause i'm used to my running nature. it's gonna take me a while to get used to that feeling of not using my legs much or at all. but actually, this ain't the reason why i'm quitting. just something fun i thought of putting. not really a reason. so that's actually two. second (or in fact, first) reason is that i've got quite a number of other stuff going on that requires my time as well. and i know that i will not be able to commit to coming for trainings consistently, the trainings that are allocated for us stated by the training schedules. yeah, so i've made the decision to leave due to that cause i know for one, i'll be missing out on alot of technical stuff, especially for the canoe polo department (more on that below). and another is cause i don't want the seniors to look at me in such contorted ways of disgust and confusion and retort back to me in ways that just provoke the nerves of everyone's limit. okay the third reason. some of you probably will know. so i won't say it. it's not cause i don't have the balls. i just can't say it. cause i've done that that so many times before and it doesn't always end happily, neither for me nor for the people in it. sorry rovers might i add.

alright, i was really interested in canoe polo. really really interested. then boom. but you know, i've got running as well. so yeah. decision made. i have really no regrets of where i'm going to. just that maybe i'll feel this pinch somewhere through the whole new year.

well, i dunno what to name this shit under so i'll jsut come up with some random lingo that has probably been outdated since the 1990's. been meeting up with them quite a lot relatively. raj and pavan. yeah, prob the only two punjabis or two of the people who fall under the singaporean-indian ethnic group. i dunno what i'm saying. yeah, they are the only two who i spend the most time with out of my whole people. i still dunno what i'm saying.

start afresh. raj and pavan. one's a thing you put pickles in if you turn his name around and the other's the devil if you spell her name on the phone if you're using the auto-type-messaging-word-shit thingy thing. yeah something like that. just type it. anyway, yeah, one i met like in primary one, the other dunno when i met her. but you know, you never know that this might be the ones that stick with you through and through. wonder why am i sounding like a girl? hm, damn, i really do sound like a girl sometimes. anyway yeah, probably the siblings i never had. and never want to have. haha, jsut kidding. a shout out to pavan, that annoying, tall, model-looking girl (she's attached guys and way out of your league) who loves to pinch and scratch arms like hell. hm, hell? satan? oh my god pavan!!!! haha, nah, just kidding. good bad girl she is, beautiful and all, painful to be with sometimes, but great fun to be with all in all. that rhymed. pavan, just put the money on the table.

i can see her again. i saw her at suntec. i'm seeing her everywhere now. or isit cause i'm closing my eyes too much? you never know how much you miss someone until you finally meet them. maybe it's time i go up to her and say what i've been wanting to say to her from the moment i met her. 'hey, you're pretty and short and run funny'. hm, maybe. and back to school means seeing the daidee clan. start shocking people again with the amount of food i eat. seeing the hot girls at biz sch and seeing how i can do stupid stunts infront of them. running around the track/school after school. going to the gym during long breaks. going out to eat during long breaks with the clan. what else. ooooh...i need to choose a GEM. an elective module for you shitheads who don't know the acronym. deciding between, psychology and counseling, boating theory, backpacking, accents and slangs (cool huh?) and real estate marketing. maybe i'll scratch off the last one. but you never know.

alright, i'm gonna end here. i'm gonna blog quite passionately and oftenly nowadays. know i've got a place to rant/crap/indulge in all things whatever and stuff like that. and i'll post funny shit up as well.