My Hand Longs For Another To Hold But While I'm Here Being Forced To Wait, I'll Pen Ironic & Irrelevant Stuff Though In The Most Matured Way Possible.

Well, yeah...i'm a lonely guy. though it may seem hard to belive, that's me...lonely, not-so emo, me. many people, especially those from my class and, well mostly others may be going like, get the hell out of here you bullshitter. but it's true guys. i may appear the crapper and lively jackass always, but as they say in the Desperate Housewife Drama serial, everyone has their own dirty laundry. Yeah...i have my own dirty laundry. not literally of course. my mom would start hitting me with the washing stick before stuffing every single piece of those god-damned dirty clothes...

Anyway, as you would be probably infer from my tittle, it would instantly hit you with the fact that i'm dying for a girl...well...of course i want a girl to hold my hand, you don't expect me to proudly hold a guy's hand intimately while walking into swensen restaurant, do you?well, anyway, yeah, a girl's hand. i don't know why, but the urge to hold one is so strong that i just get so...so...i feel this deep sense of depression. yeah...but hey, depression should never lead to desperation. i don't wanna be like those freaking pervetic, sometimes pedophilic, losers you see on tv who rape and do freakin shit to young girls. and to those who thought devil could spawn no more sick and twisted minions, there are those menatally retarded who do these kinds of shit to infants, toddlers and the elderly.

anyay, i just wanna be with a girl, who can just hang...ok i'm a guy...you can't stop me...we were manufactured with the genes to make love, not like those saditistic bastards i mentioned above, but love as in, making a girl happy, and all that kinds of stuff that are already appearing in your mind.

well, i think my beggining was abit too dark wasn't it...hmmm...but really, oh no it wasn't. anyway, there's the special girl and the one i want...thought because of some unforseen circumstances, the communiction part has broken down...all i can say is...till we meet again baby...okay...that reminded me of the terminator...well, how cool will it be...for me to have...wait...never mind...if i were to write that down, it'll sound too emo...

anyway, just wanna ask, how many of you guys and girls wanna hold someone's hand right now. and that someone is someone whom you like alot but can't be with at the moment, either she's a crush or she stays far away from you. well, close your eyes right now...imagine them infront of you, and he/she is giving you the most addictive smile you would ever see in your whole life. imagine that for a minute or for how long you want. if you want, you can close your eyes forever, but becareful your parents may think you're either mad or just plain stupid. okay...when you open them, remember to open them slowly, and when you do open them, i want you to think of them as there with you always but never ever say...'hmm, he/she is not by my side.'. no you dumb ass, think that he/she is always by you but never think of them as gone. you do...then you'll alwyas miss him/her and the feeling of holding his/her hand will come again shortly. what i recommend is a very good trick. it may make you come off as a freak infront of others when you're closing your eyes and smiling to yourself, but in all your years of living, who would know better than you yourself.

wow...i sound so mature. is this good? i hope it is...i'm currently getting over the fact that i'm immature and guess what...i'm doing a great job if i do say so myself. hmmm...maybe now i'll be more respected. but i don't know why, but when i seem to be getting over to my matured side from my immature side, who would've guessed that i would become slightly emo...

well, is blog supposed to be long or short. hmm...i don't give a damn..the most you can do is take part in making decision with me, but note i say with me, not for me. yeah, as much i love constructive criticisms, i'd love fr you to stay our of my life affairs. well, of course that was directed at a few people. hmmm...wowowo...sounding too freakin...nevr mind.

well, gotta log off soon...i know i miss a few parts and all that but hey...i'ma go and find my crappy self because school starts tomorrow. oh yeah...school, haven't finshed english homework. well, gonna hear mdm wee start her boring lecture and ending with something like you do whatever you want, i don't care anymore...but actually she kinda does...hmmm...maybe...

well, should i put up a tag-board...i can't really find the time but what the heck...i'll just go scouting for a normal yet appealing (to me) tag-board so you can put up...well, you know what a tag-board is right...well, is it called tag-board...cos that's what i call it...whatever...

Culda